It's not just that the dream isn't happening. Nothing is happening. Keeping my eyes open, actively looking, and wishing and hoping have yielded absolutely no results. So I decided to expend my mental energy in more useful pursuits.
I also have just about zero hope that this attitude will cause the universe to suddenly hand me a date just to be perverse, but I don't even care enough anymore to be annoyed by that.
I mean, I am angry. I'm angry at Chattanooga for sucking so hard, and at myself because I really should have known better than to come back. But I don't think the anger is driving me to give up. Realism is.
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winterfish
no subject
Date: 2006-11-27 05:44 pm (UTC)I also have just about zero hope that this attitude will cause the universe to suddenly hand me a date just to be perverse, but I don't even care enough anymore to be annoyed by that.
I mean, I am angry. I'm angry at Chattanooga for sucking so hard, and at myself because I really should have known better than to come back. But I don't think the anger is driving me to give up. Realism is.