darkluna | (no subject)

(no subject)

I really need to go out with a camera handy, because along the road to the main business area near my house, there's a huge pile of leaves, with a teeny little plastic bag, apparently filled with leaves, sitting on top of it. Every time I see it, I imagine it as a photo for one of those demotivational posters, with the caption INADEQUACY.

***

Dear locals,

I know this is a tough one, so bear with me, OK? Sometimes, people my age are not married. I promise that this is so. The assumption that I am is nearly universal, but that does not make it correct. So please stop calling me "Mrs. Fountain" and asking questions about my husband. It makes me horribly tempted to start telling outrageous lies.

sincerely,
~~Mrs. Flame Alchemist~~darkluna

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Mrs. Roy Mustang,

Oh, completely... I FEEL YOU THERE! I get asked about being married, etc etc. NOOOO... I'm almost 32 and single with a dog and birds, so I am a SPINSTER!!!

Well, if I wanted to be crazy I could claim to be "Soul bonded" to Havoc... that does have a nice ring to it...

Regards,
Mrs. Jean Havoc

Mrs. Havoc,

Hee! You make me smile. And yes, we're in the same boat. I'm almost 33, with cats. :-)

In your recipe for crazy, don't forget a healthy pinch of "Only I am allowed to write fanfic about him." Luckily, unlike Snape's wives, you and I can coexist peacefully.

xo,
Mrs. Mustang

It never hurts to tell the truth if you dole it out in parcels small enough to be deceptive. Say you left the Mrs. with the ex-husband out west.

Oh, good point. Then maybe I could burst into tears at being reminded of OMG TEH WOEZ. Heh.

I dont understand your reluctance. There is NOTHING funnier than outrageous lies. Having your mom tell you that Mrs. So&So told her that Mr. Xyz said your hubby went missing in Iraq, but then later sent you a letter saying he'd changed his name and left you for a harem of new Iraqi wives, but that you were okay with it since you didn't care for US military policy anyway is surely all the justification you need.

Convoluted and outrageous. I love it!

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