"I'll call you." is a required phrase taught to us in boy class in 6th grade. It doesn't mean "I'll call you." It means, "I hereby offer you this ritual phrase to observe social custom, and to avoid any chance at having to hurt you while I am here, or to create a situation in which I must debate or elucidate why I may or may not call you in 3 days." The fact that the latter is indicated in the exact same way that "I will actually call your ass as soon as enough time has elapsed to make me appear non-desperate" might as well be completely coincidental.
I don't think rules are important compared to being interested or not. I have never had sex on the first date, but of 3 girls I've had sex with on the second date, I wanted to see 2 of them again. If I enjoyed spending time with someone and they jumped my bones on date1, great. I'll watch them over the next few days to see if they push too hard, but otherwise great. If I enjoyed spending time with someone and they put me off for a few dates, that would also be acceptable. Build-up can be nice, too.
If I only enjoyed spending time with someone a little bit, I probably wouldn't call for a second date regardless of whether or not they put out on date1. And do you want those guys actually calling you, regardless of whether or not you had sex with them, and regardless of whether or not they said, "I'll call you"? Probably not, since it will be signal noise to confuse you at best, and a major waste of time at worst.
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winterfish
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Date: 2005-03-11 07:12 pm (UTC)I don't think rules are important compared to being interested or not. I have never had sex on the first date, but of 3 girls I've had sex with on the second date, I wanted to see 2 of them again. If I enjoyed spending time with someone and they jumped my bones on date1, great. I'll watch them over the next few days to see if they push too hard, but otherwise great. If I enjoyed spending time with someone and they put me off for a few dates, that would also be acceptable. Build-up can be nice, too.
If I only enjoyed spending time with someone a little bit, I probably wouldn't call for a second date regardless of whether or not they put out on date1. And do you want those guys actually calling you, regardless of whether or not you had sex with them, and regardless of whether or not they said, "I'll call you"? Probably not, since it will be signal noise to confuse you at best, and a major waste of time at worst.