Adventures, or something, in matchmaking

[darkluna]

So I said I wanted a boy often enough that my friends began to harrass me to put out a personal, and to ask for exactly what I wanted.


It went like this:

Holding auditions for guitarist boy

You could say I'm picky. I prefer to say I know exactly what I want, and how can the universe give it to me if I don't ask?

If you're my dream boy, you have long hair and you're at least as smart as I am. You're in your late 20s or early 30s, have a good sense of humor (the snarkier the better!), and can be silly. You're taller than I am by at least a few inches, and on the slim-to-skinny side. It's lovely if you smoke, but just tobacco, please. I am NOT "herb friendly" and I'm downright hostile towards anything harder. I'm completely unattached, and you should be, too. Owning a Strat gets you extra points. :-)

Me: 29, very bright, very pretty, half-gothy, half-goofy, long reddish-purpleish hair, big brown eyes, 5'4", in good shape but still nicely curvy, writer, smoker, vegetarian. I am the only person I know who likes Steeleye Span *and* Skinny Puppy, but I'm really a sucker for Hendrix, Clapton, and Stevie Ray. I look as good in black velvet and fishnets as I do in jeans, a t-shirt, and a baseball cap. I'm perfectly happy on my own, but it would be nice to find someone I could see keeping. All in all, I'm a pretty stable, together girl, a bit on the quirky side, who just happens to get weak in the knees over good guitar solos.

So, who wants to show me what all those pedals do?

The first reply I got was from someone who wasn't a guitarist, didn't have long hair, and said he didn't mind pot. Hmm. Now in general, the first two are negotiable when I'm just looking for a random boy, but you'd think the "NOT herb friendly" would have made some kind of impression. That part ain't negotiable, kids. Hence the caps.

The second gem I got looked like this: You sound like a freak

No wander you are unattached

I hope he felt really good about himself after sending that. At least, as good as he could feel given that he 1. Has an AOL account, 2. Can't spell or punctuate, and 3. Is actually taking the trouble to reply to an ad just to say he thinks it's dumb.

I am not filled with optimism for the male of the species.


In other news, I finished a story today! Go me!

Comments

[wintersweet.livejournal.com]

#2's ad is probably "I wunt a women who can clean guns good and doesnt talk back to me if I want a beer and she should dress real pretty and not talk too much cause God says women shouldnt think too much or their babies will be shaped funny. Big tits escential."

[darkluna.livejournal.com]

Hee hee hee! You're probably right! :-)

[raveninthewind.livejournal.com]

Ha! As one of those urging you to take out an ad for exactly what you want, I say:
Good luck!